born to mess up

me thinks it was friday morning, ahhh then loads to say......

had a lovely day on friday, did some baking with the girls, yes i bake...got them to work cleaning mummies house and was well in time for the oldest to go to school, normally we are running up the street only to stop whilst i am calling ' hurry we going to be late', sis came round to try and relieve her work boredom (don't you have to be at work to be bored whilst working?), and i had a productive afternoon grooming new men.....that sounds like their all under age, i assure you they are not, not one of them!

so i'll start with the ones that you guys already know and then we'll move right along to the fresh meat.

the porch, is still a loving moi, he feels badly about friday night and i am doing little to nothing to make him feel any better, heartless and shitty yes but as the saying goes 'treat them mean to keep them keen'.

the player, is well and truely off the books, i couldn't take one more text saying 'i wanna fuck', god i am about to hit thirty and i need slightly more than that nowadays. i have one slight problem with him still, in that i have no nerve to actually tell them when i am not needing their services anymore, he will get bored i hope.....soon.

and max, hhmmm, now he is a one.
max did come to mine on friday night, he rang about half eleven (spoiling my enjoyment of american idol) and said 'on my way give me some company for the drive', i told him how nauhty he was for driving whilst talking and put the phone down.
not to be discouraged though, little max turned up on the doorstep, armful of cds (love the music) and before i had time to shut the door he had planted his mouth firmly on mine!
we had a really nice night, chatting and taking the piss and you know being very rude.....naked, yep i am a big whore!
anyway the boy is mental and gives off total conflicting vibes, on the phone he wets himself over me, i am apparently the best thing since sliced bread, but in person he is uber cool infact to the point of ice, thats not to say he is unfriendly, very very friendly he is but he holds back........i find this totally weird, i have a sneaking suspiscion he wants to be in the driving seat, total control, which is shit because i am so used to be the driver.
so he hasn't called or texted since then and i am soo not the needy type so i haven't either......easy come easy go i guess.

nothing to say about the old man, he will be back, but i am letting him take his own good time.

right now we are getting to the nitty gritty and there is two of them!
hhmmmm, have to think of names now, shit.

ok man number one = muso, man number two = big hands?

these to are very much still in the planning stage so here is just a brief overveiw.

so mr muso, is a music producer, not so much older than me and not really the type i would normally go for but theres something about him that makes me smile, he just gets it, without having to explain anything, he gets it. hes is a relationship (good for me) and he likes the same kind of shit that i do, cool very very cool.

big hands is quite a lot older and totally married, very flirty and has cheated on his wife on a number of occasions before, just from that sentence he sounds like a big shit but he isn't , no more than me anyway.

so its my favourite day tommorrow, i am sure there will be a huge amount of goss, loving mondays x

so it all went horribly wrong last night, was getting ready, excuses made, kids in bed and then a text saying his girlfriend had crashed her car and he had to do loas of running around, he didn't seem too happy and has been on the blower today to say how sorry he is but, one life lost, two to go!
anyway, i am not so bothered, i can wait especially since i am mucking around with a few.......

hmmmm, update on max, the little cutie (idon'tknowwhy: he is my fav at the mo), so i have met max before, you know in a friendly way, very friendly he was too! so he doesn't worry me, we are cool together all very nice and relaxed and he talks the talk, full of the charm and then some.
max texted yesterday, he was thinking about coming over tonight, i know you are all gasping in horror! he knows where i live yes, he has even seen the inside of my house but we have never done anything rude here, i feel tonight is going to screw all of that up!
the husband is out for his usual friday night whatever he does and the little ones are at my mothers so i am to be alone until tomorrow afternoon, i have told him i am not sure but i know me and if the offer of sex is there i am going to go for it, yesterday was a wash out i need some wind in my sails.

the player has been put on the backburner until i need him, not sure if i will at this point but its always good to have a backup i guess!!

and if two defo's and two back burners (old man being the other) aren't enough i may have just found two new ones!!will update you on those tomorrow, bet you lot can't wait........god i am loving this!

Ha, what is it about work that brings the men out in droves?? I think it might be my job, don't actually come into contact with many at work but as soon as i say what i do.......well theres the love love love!

So anyway, tuesday was a funny day, my little ones go to nannys on a tuesday and i get to just chill and muck about, i spent most of the day laying about thinking how lovely it is not to have the kids shouting 'mummy i need a drink/wee/tweenies', don't get me wrong i love those girls more than i could ever put into words but ahhhh the peace is a gift sent straight from a higher being!

So i was surprised to get a message from Max on tuesday morning, hadn't heard from him since sunday and was just about to delete his number (note to girls: never send the last text, always leave them wanting more, never text first let them get in touch and this is the killer, if they don't get in touch within 48 hours, delete their number, it is like a beacon to men, they know when you have deleted and then they come back like a moth to the flame!suckers), when 'ping' , he was back!
Max is a funny one, he is a couple of years younger than me and very self assured, not really my type, i prefer them hanging on my every word but he has something strange about him, anyway we spent the day chatting and it was all cool, spoke to him later at work, think he loves me, ha but don't they all!!

The player i have decided has got to go, he was my first little bit of naughtyness but he has run his course now and i am soooo uninterested in the constant sex talk its unbelieveable, i have a brain and the more i talk to him the more i feel the grey matter jut slip sliding anyway, i know i want an affair but does that mean i just want to spend the day using filthy words and talking about his cock? He texted last night at work and i didn't even bother reading it, just deleted straight away, he will hopefully get the message soon enough...............shit will he, i can't handle a nutty stalker!

And then theres the porch, ahhhhh him, he decided yesterday that he really wants to see me, after a couple of months of my piss taking he has got up the nerve to actually take me somewhere, so tonight i am off to the pictures, tomorrow will be interesting reading i guess?!

Ho ho, mondays used to fill me with a sense of dread, all the work and normal monday pantsness.....but no longer, oh no not only do i not work mondays anymore (or thursdays and fridays!!) but after the slack of perving over the weekend, mondays are like christmas every week without the stocking and the turkey!

So i was back in the saddle and had a very productive day, they kids and myself wandered up to feed the donkeys up the road with the moldy carrots i found festering at the back of the cupboard and then went and feed the neighbours cat, back home by 11 and as soon as we stepped through the door the texts started.

The player had risen early to commence with a love in, still in bed and there was some rather suspiscous moaning going on, god i wish he could just wait for a few minutes before he starts with the playing with his manhood, anyway we had some chat, without the dirt i might add, i may be a shitty wife but refuse point blank share the filth with the girls at their tender age.
After that phone call i started to wonder if The player is going to last the long haul, i mean as much as i love the attention from him i have a sneaking suspiscion he is lavishing this much on others too and if i am going to have this affair i at least want to do it with someone who i trust isn't fucking half the married population.
So the player went to the bottom of the pile and me and the girls did some bread making!!

Next up was The porch, sunday i was feeling decidely unkeen about him, couldn't put my finger on exactly why but yesterday he has managed through pure grit to pull something out of the bag, who knows what it is but he just is really nice and i don't have the same feeling as i get with The player, Mr porch is definatly only a one women man (well two if you include his girlfriend), we have a really nice conversation later in the day and i am warming up to him quite quickly.

Then theres the old man, love him.......no don't worry not going to be throwing everything down the shitter but i am very aware that this man has the potential to ruin my life, its the history i guess, the one that got away.
Last night he text me out of the blue in the evening, he had spent the weekend moving house and wanted to know if i would like to go out next weekend, i played it very cool and said i would think about it, i am going.......of course i am going!!!! He finished of the text session by saying 'i am so glad you are around again x'.Awwwwwwwww shit shit shit............note to self, can't get in too deep, messy very very messy.

And max, nothing to say about max, haven't heard from him since sunday morning, not too bothered though, so many men so little time!

Have a little mantra stuck on the fridge at the moment 'live for the moment,die for the cause', not really sure what the cause is at the moment but i am soooo living for the moment!

Work tonight, two nights of grind then back to the leisure, loving that!

Right so today we went shopping, nice family time together, all cool no hassles, the husband has a new car so he couldn't wait to pack us all in a whisk us off someplace, even if it does mean shopping in the pissing down rain!! He is very hungover, spent most of last night in the pub and then managed to stumble to his mothers which is loads nearer than our house, i love it when he does that not only do i get free reign of the remote (which straight away turns the telly off and the music on) but i get to discuss my ever awful behaviour with my closest friends without having to go up to the shop for milk.

On the boy front, nothing much has happened today, a few texts from the player which is very strange it being the weekend and him being married. A couple from max, just telling me about music i should buy.....roll on tomorrow when they are all at work and the fun begins again. I bloody love mondays!

Ok, i guess i should use this first entry to explain why i am writing this and why i am doing what i am doing but firstly i will give you a little overveiw of the wonder that is me, so you guys can call me jess (not my real name but than no one from here on out is going to have their real names posted by me, you will get why soon).

I am a 29 year old quite happily married mother of two girls,very big into the music scene and with a full social circle, my marriage, although not dying a death, is lacking lots of the old f.u.n and most importantly the sex, so i find myself in a weird situation, do i bump along unhappily with a great husband(who will called the artist formely known as the husband) who gives me and the girls so much in the way of support, conversation and company or do i get greedy and find the fun, laughing and sex elsewhere while putting on the good mother/wife role at home?

I have chosen the latter, as it says on the tin, i was born to mess up!

To just get you up to date quickly, the main players at the moment are The husband (x), The player (a reporter for a tabloid, probably not a smart move, but he is very cute and very married),Max (seriously good looking, full of the charm and very good in the sack oh and single), The porch (used to drive a porsche, nice bloke in the same situation as me, not slept with him) and The old man (not actually that old, but have known him since i was 18 and have always called him that, he has just got back in touch after a five year absence).
I love to give funny names, hoping that you will get used to this as time moves on.

So this is me, love or hate what i am doing (i am not stupid, i know thats its very wrong) i am doing it and using this as my little soapbox to sound off about whats going on along the way, i think its going to make interesting reading but be warned, i am far to frank for my own good!